I should be writing a paper, but I wrote 15 pages over the weekend and the words simply won’t come off my fingertips anymore.
I should be reading that journal article, but this new collection of poetry rolls around my head in a much nicer way.
I should be in bed early tonight, but there’s a big meteor shower that I might, possibly -likely- will want to wait up for.
In fact there’s a lot of things I should be doing. A lot of things I should just plain old be. I should meet that friend for lunch, I should be out running, I should slow down and soak up November, I should be praying with consistency, I should be more patient.
But… at the end of the day I have a whole stack of “shoulds” and very few things scratched off my list. All this should-ing and striving is wearing me out.
That’s when I need to be reminded of this verse: “Be still and know that I am God.” That is: cease striving, let go, relax. In Hebrew it can be translated- to hang limp, to sink down, to lower, to let go, abandon, leave, give.
I need to hear that. I need to remember that I can abandon my lists, leave my junk behind, and lower myself before Him. I need to know that I can stop being Atlas and set down the globe. That when I give out and my legs collapse from underneath me, I will be held. That God is so much bigger than all of this- than my paper, and my textbooks, and meteor showers, and me.
Forgiven by Thomas Blackshear